The Fury of Love
by FluffballCat
Summary: Millie has always been jealous of Silverstream, what happens when she finally does something because of it?


**Millie's P.O.V**  
It was the battle of StarClan and the Dark Forest, I was fighting on StarClan's side. Or I should have been. I was, all of them except for one of the cats. The one cat I was going to kill. Silverstream. She was Graystripe's mate. His other mate. And I wanted to be the only one of his mates. The only one. That was why my eyes were strained for even the smallest bit of silver in the forest. I was not fighting until I found that cat. And when I found that cat I was going to kill her. Kill her for the second time. Then if it came to it I would kill her tag along daughter that was sure to come for me. No one would see. I would be safe. If anyone accused me, it would be my word against theirs. And Graystripe was sure to take my side. Then of course Firestar and Sandstorm would join my team as well. It was playing dominoes. It was easy. I even had a strategy.

Suddenly a streak of silver so like my own flashed by me. I knew that the cat it belonged to was in every way more beautiful than I and I dared not compete until now. I shrieked for help, even calling the molly's name. "Silverstream!" Sure enough the molly appeared, seeing that I was actually not in need of help, she backed away. But I pounced. We tumbled into the bushes in a ball of shining silver. My eyes burned with red fury at the cat who still occupied my mate's heart.

I suddenly felt strong. So strong. Invincible almost. I felt like extra muscles were popping up inside me. My teeth were fangs. Long sharp and pearly white, ready to sink into the flesh of anyone. But mostly Silverstream. My claws were long, sharp, with ragged edges like a saw the twolegs used to cut down trees. I was a monster. I knew it. Even though I refused to believe what I knew. I wanted to believe that I was doing it for the good of my mate's heart. But I knew I wasn't. I knew because it felt good. It felt good to have another cat at my mercy. It felt good that I was about to kill a cat. Even though that cat was on my side. But not the right side of my heart. I was so rapped up in the fury that turned my eyes a curdling blood red, that I didn't notice a shape watching my every move.

Suddenly I was overthrown. But I let them. It was a trick a old one but a good one. I waited a while, letting the pretty molly do as she wanted for a while. I was going to overthrow her anyway. I cut off Silverstream a little while after she started her sentence. "Why did you attack-" I flipped her over so that I was on her back. I put all my weight on her. Pressuring her stomach. A little more and she would die. But I lowered my jaw too bite her neck and whispered "I'm glad your life is in my paws." But before I could finish her a loud smooth voice that always talked to me in such a loving manner spoke.

 _"Stop!"_

My head turned so that I faced the speaker. I was frozen. How had he caught me? No one should have seen me. But now that he had seen me I felt like a million prying eyes were on me. Slowly I stepped off Silverstream, my eyes as little and dainty as always. I was not going to loose the one and only one I loved. "Gray! It was for your own good. You always loved her more than me. You couldn't love a memory." My voice was meek and small as though I didn't realize I had done something wrong. I let silent tears role down my face and a sniffle or two. But to my surprise he didn't come to comfort me. He stayed where he was. Stiff legged and angry.

 _"Why did you do that? You shouldn't be my mate!"_

His words rung in my head. All I had done, evil or good I had done for him. I had done to make him happy. I had done so the two of us could be together. I had never expected to do so much harm to him. I knew I should have genuinely cried. I knew I should have wept. But I didn't. I was proud of what I had done. All I had done had been for him. There was no shame in that. I saw no shame in the fact I had been about to kill Graystripe's mate. I was proud.

But what I saw next completely ruined the feeling. Graystripe who had once stood still and stiff possibly still on my side padded towards the enemy. Towards the silver shape that was not me. He stood in front of her, and whispered something in her ear. A comforting motion. But the comforting motion was not towards me.

 _"Don't touch her."_

Those were the words that he should have spoken to Silverstream. When he was protecting me. But it was the other way around. I was enraged. I was furious. This was not the way the story should have went. It was all messed up all wrong. I was enraged. I was going to kill. I lunged at Graystripe, by teeth and claws bared. But Silverstream jumped in front. My claws pierced her skin and my teeth sunk into her throat. Her starry body fell to the ground but did not disappear. I saw Graystripe lunge at me in a ball of fury. I felt his teeth sink into my throat. I fell to the ground.

Several cats padded wordlessly out of the bushes. Sandstorm came out and let him rest his head on her shoulder as the tears for a cat that wasn't me came. The starry shapes of Feathertail, Bluestar, and Firestar appeared next to him. My daughters Blossomfall and Briarlight as well as Bumblestripe were sure to follow, but they took their spots around Silverstream's body and not mine. I knew. I was watching from a place beyond the stars. It was dark. There was nothing there but black, but I could see what happened below me. I knew my body was now something that was shunned. For I now lived in a place beyond the stars. And though Silverstream was gone she was a star, the silver star that shone so brightly, and I was nothing. I had not wanted Graystripe to be miserable.

I had failed my quest.

In every way possible.

I was doomed because of it.

I was doomed to watch my mate. The one cat I had truly loved be alone. In pain. Because of what I had done. It was all my fault. Everything. I shouldn't have done it but I had. I could see what was happening in the living world, but I dared not peak. The two other things visible against the black were a stripe of gray across the middle that looked strangely like a stream colored silver as well. The funny thing was, there were walls. Walls that formed the shape of a heart. And it seemed to me that red rain was falling from it.

That was my heart. I was in a place where I was always bleeding. My heart would always bleed because of what I had done.


End file.
